


One Thousand Timeless Roses

by swiftonthedownside



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M, wolfstar
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-03-08
Updated: 2013-06-16
Packaged: 2017-12-04 15:27:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 11,405
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/712279
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/swiftonthedownside/pseuds/swiftonthedownside
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The story of two boys that spans several thousand years.  Rated for chapters in the future please do not be angry.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

> The professor's name is pronounced like the end of the name 'SoCRATES'.

“Sirius, get _up_.”

Sirius just groaned, turning over. Remus let out a huffy breath. “Come _on_ , you stupid oaf. We’re going to be late for Divination. Sirius Black, it’s the first day of school! Get up! Siriuuuuussssss!”

“Moony, shut your mouth,” James grumbled from the other side of the room. Remus rounded on him.

“And you too! You great ignorant ogres, get up! It’s the first goddamn day of school, get your arses out of bed! Sirius…”

Remus groaned, falling on his back on top of Sirius. “Get uuuuuuuup. Look, it’s already seven o’clock. You’ll have to shower,” he started ticking things off on his fingers, “get dressed, ‘do your hair,’ get your school bag, which lucky for you I packed last night, and then go down and eat. We’ll barely have enough time for just that, let alone running up nine flights of stairs and through over half the castle to get to the Divination room! Sirius! Come on!”

He continued to lay there a moment, waiting for some kind of response. When he didn’t get one, he pulled out his trump card.

“Or I could leave without you.”

Of course, he immediately felt Sirius’s hands on him as arms grabbed him and pulled him against a Sirius that shot up in bed.

“Moony dearest,” Sirius sighed sleepily, petting Remus’s head. “You know I love you. I wouldn’t ever abandon you to James. So you wouldn’t abandon me, would you? Would you? Moony?”

Remus didn’t respond, looking across the room aloofly. Sirius glanced down at him worriedly. “You wouldn’t make me listen to him try to flirt with Evans, would you?”

Remus opened his mouth to respond, but apparently the mention of Lily was enough to tug James roughly out of bed and send him tripping over things (‘How in hell is the room already so cluttered?’ Remus wondered) in the direction of the bathroom. Remus smiled. “Well, I just might.”

“Moony, Moony, Moony…” Sirius sang. “Of course you wouldn’t.”

“Actually, I’m very hungry…”

Sirius sighed, but finally fell out of bed, stumbling haphazardly into the bathroom after James. Remus smiled as the water started running. Two down, one to go.

He looked over at the slightly-less-messy bed beside Sirius’s, and the mound in the center that was Peter. “Pete, we will be leaving in twenty minutes.”

That was all it took for Peter to crawl out and walk calmly into the bathroom, shedding his clothes as he went in a trail easily picked up later. Remus nodded to himself, and sat down on his bed to wait.

~

It was more than thirty minutes later that they left the room, and after a short scuffle in the hall; Peter falling down the stairs; Remus mending him; Sirius getting impatient and cursing a Slytherin; a talk with McGonagall about “being adults” and “Prefect’s duty, Mr. Lupin”; Remus having to fix the result of James trying to woo Miss Evans (“A button nose, Potter. I think I like you better this way.”) against his will (“She said she _liked_ it, Moony!”); and an argument over the last cold bits of egg at the breakfast table, they were all racing through the empty halls, reaching the staircase to the Divination Tower just as the bell rang.

They were all heaving for breath as they looked at the task ahead of them. Sirius and James slumped against each other.

“I can’t make it, Moony,” Sirius complained. “Carry me.”

“I bloody well will not.” Remus wiped his face. “C’mon, just a little further.” He started up the stairs on shaking legs, the rest groaning and following after him.

They finally made it all the way up, and climbed up the ladder into the room. Class had started probably ten minutes ago, but the professor was nowhere in sight and the students were still all tittering to each other about this and that. There weren’t many places left to sit. There was a whole table at the front of the room, next to one that just had two girls sitting at it. They both perked up at the entrance of the Marauders. One would have to sit with them.

Remus, of course, went straight to the front and claimed the front table for England, Hogwarts, the Wizarding Community, and the Marauders. The girls masked their disappointment by turning their eyes to James and Sirius.

Both of whom sat next to Remus. James smirked at a crestfallen Peter. “Sorry, mate. But there’s a seat at the table behind us.”

The girls were considerably more disappointed than before, and with the addition of Peter the trio was so glum, Professor Crates nearly screamed when he finally entered the room.

“I feel that some kind of misfortune has befallen you three,” he breathed, as though the world rested on their shoulders.

Sirius scoffed. “This class is always a laugh,” he muttered to Remus, who shushed him violently.

“Today,” Professor Crates was continuing, “we beging the curriculum for this year. Your fifth year at Hogwarts. Very exciting. Isn’t it?”

He swooped right into James’s face on the last sentence, waiting for an answer expectantly. James jumped, turning red. “Er, I-I guess so?”

“Quite!” Crates straightened up again, continuing his vacant pacing as he spoke. “Yes, it should be. In fact, I forsee it to be. For some of you, this year’s curriculum will mean something. Something great.” He eyed Remus for a moment, causing him to shift around, then turned his eyes to Sirius, then James, then half of the other people in the room, dragging on an uncomfortable silence.

“This year,” he finally said, so loudly that the whole room flinched, “we will be learning about past lives.”

Remus frowned. “What?”

Sirius gave him a look, begging him not to draw Crates’s attention, but it was too late. Crates had descended, madman eyes wide, hair fluttering in a nonexistent breeze, fingers wriggling in the air, clutching at nothing.

“Past lives, Mr. Lupin!” Crates exclaimed.

“Like, reincarnation?” James kicked Remus under the table. And he kicked him hard. Remus ignored him. “But that’s impossible. Reincarnation isn’t real, you can’t escape death.”

“You think so?” Crates gave him his crazy eyes for a moment, fingering a chain around his neck. Sirius noted an odd, triangular pendant on the chain. Like an eye. Madman. “Well, I just so happen to know different, Mr. Lupin.”

He swept away to the blackboard, before turning back to the students.

“Divination,” Crates started, “has given us reason to believe in past lives. As Mr. Lupin has stated, past lives is a concept synonymous with reincarnation. The theme that when you die, you will live again a new life as someone or something else. Generally, the belief is that if you are good in one life, you will get good things in the next. Be born a millionaire, perhaps. But if you do wrong things, you will get a bad next life. Be born as a bee, maybe.

“But this is not the definition Divination has given us. Divination’s concept is Divine Cosmic Meaning, that the universe has something it wants done and it will not cease until it is given that. The reincarnation theme with Divination is that of One Thousand Timeless Roses.

“One Thousand Timeless Roses is a theory stating that lovers are incarnate. That lovers hold a bond through time, through the moons and the stars of the universe, that invariably pulls them together time and again, so that their hearts are forever each other’s, never to stray through the galaxies lost and alone, but always with a path to follow that will lead them home.

“This theory states that a path is left through time and space. A path of rose petals, per se. A thousand. Or more. It is the traces of this path that the heart finds when it is separated from the other, and it is this path it follows, and invariably creates, while searching for and eventually finding its partner. It is a path that is never erased, just as time cannot be undone, even if the history is not necessarily written down. As with unwritten history, it just fades, gets covered with paths that criss-cross over it on their own ways. But it is _never_ lost.

“Because this trail is never ending and eternal, it is possible for living human beings to trace it, so long as they have the aid of magic running through their veins. The only thing they need is their celestial partner, per se, or someone close to it, and some good concentration. Or, if the bond is actually strong enough, they may stumble upon the path on their own. Wandering backwards through time, meeting their lover again and again, on a trail of timeless heart.

“And that, my pupils, is what we shall be working on this term.”

The room stared at him silently. It was Peter who finally spoke.

“How are we supposed to do this if we don’t know who our lover is?” he asked, sounding thoroughly confused by the whole subject.

“Glad you asked,” Crates said emphatically, swooping in on him and the two girls. “That’s where all the fun is. You get to find out! Now of course, some of you will not meet that person for a very long time. And some of you might not have anyone at all. Not at this point in the universe. But if you’ve got one, there at least has to be someone close to it at the school. The numbers make it impossible for there not to be!”

“Are you saying our assignment is to date everyone in the school?” Frank Longbottom said slowly.

“Precisely! Until you find one that works!”

They all looked at him dumbfounded for a moment. “A-and, if no one works?”

“Well, I cannot blame the lonely.”

There was more silence, then Crates clapped his hands excitedly. “Right! Get to it, then!”

“Get to what?” Sirius muttered, confused to the point of frustration. Remus was still doubtful about all of this. James got up and immediately flounced over to Lily. The two girls started talking to Peter almost reluctantly.

Remus and Sirius glanced at each other, and started laughing quietly. “This is bullshit,” Sirius said, shaking his head.

“Right. There’s no way this is true.”

“Oh, don’t get me wrong, I believe it,” Sirius said. “It’s bullshit that he’s got us wandering around looking for birds to stare into each other’s eyes with. Universal cosmic pull, or whatever. It’ll come when it comes.”

“You believe in this?” Remus asked dumbfoundedly. “This whole cockneyed idea of past lives?”

Sirius shrugged. “Well, why shouldn’t I? There’s no proof against it. Besides, it’s…kind of a nice thought. That there’s someone for me out there.”

Remus scoffed. “And what if you’re alone? What if the universe hasn’t given you a match yet?”

Sirius thought a moment, then shrugged. “Guess I’ll have to wait.” He leered over at Remus. “Think you’ve got a bird?”

“No,” Remus said, without hesitation and very decisively. “Even if this whole thing was true…who would the universe hate enough to pair them with me?” He chuckled sadly. “That’s just cruel.”

“Now don’t talk that way Moony,” Sirius said, nearly exasperated. “Any girl would be lucky to have you. You could do all her homework.”

Remus punched Sirius. “Oi, you shut it.”

Sirius laughed, but was interrupted by a tinny sort of clearing-of-the-throat. He looked around to see a girl standing by him, twisting her hair around her fingers.

“Hi, Sirius,” she said softly. “Um, I was just…wondering…if maybe you’d want to see if we’re soul mates?”

Sirius’s eyebrows shot up, and he turned to wiggle them at Remus suggestively. “Why, I’d love to, babe.” He turned back to her seductively. “Tell me everything about yourself…”

Remus shook his head. Divination this year would surely be the worst of them all.

~

“Sirius, get _off_.”

“Mooooooooony…” Sirius leaned more of his weight onto Remus causing the boy to hunch up over his paper even more. “Puh-leeeeeeeeeease? I won’t take all the answers! Just the ones I don’t know!”

“That _is_ all the answers!”

“Reeeeemus!”

“Sirius…Sirius, get - get off of - AH!”

Sirius had obviously over-estimated Remus’s werewolf balance, strength, and coordination, because he had put all of his weight on Remus’s poor, thin shoulders. And of course, Remus didn’t have the time to _always_ be strong. And due to this, his poor, thin shoulders couldn’t support the weight, and he and Sirius were sent tumbling to the floor.

“Ow! Sirius!” Remus shoved at the other boy. “Get off of me! You stupid git!”

The population of the Common Room giggled as Sirius lifted his head, smirking at Remus. “Oh, Moony, baby. You don’t like it?”

“I swear to God…”

“Because I do.” Sirius winked at Remus, grinding against him, and Remus flushed.

“You stupid ponce.” He finally shoved Sirius off of himself, standing and dusting off his clothes. “You really are an annoying moron, you know that?”

“I know it!”

Remus glared at Sirius. He rather did not appreciate any of this. It all seemed too familiar to him. “Shove off.” He settled back in to do his homework. “And _no_ , you may _not_ see my paper.”

Sirius pouted. “I’ve made my chances worse, haven’t I?”

“Yep.”

Sirius continued to sit on the floor and pout for the remainder of the evening, leaning all over Remus’s legs as he did his work. He finally looked down at him after the Common Room had emptied and the fire was burning out. “Are you ready for bed?”

“Yes!” Sirius leapt up, grinning now that it seemed Remus had forgiven him. Remus just rolled his eyes, packing up his parchment and quills and books. “Well, give me a second and I’ll go up with you.”

James and Peter were already either asleep or in their beds by the time they got up there, and it was only a few minutes more before the lights were turned out and everyone was settled in their beds.

Remus spent several minutes attempting to sleep, settling in nicely on his side and allowing himself to sink into the blankets and pillows. He was just falling asleep when he heard someone whisper his name.

He sighed, and rolled over to look through the darkness.

“Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?”

Sirius blinked at him from a gap in the curtains. “Uh, were you asleep?”

“No,” Remus sighed. “What do you want?”

“Well, I just wanted to apologize. You seemed upset. Which only occurred to me now. Um.” He rubbed his neck. “So, sorry.”

“Go to bed, Sirius.”

“Right.” He seemed a bit relieved. “Goodnight, Moony.”


	2. Chapter Two

_It was a very cold night. Why was he even out on a night like this? It was too cold. Far too cold. New York was impossibly cold this time of year. That slimy git. Why had he suggested they meet here? And at this hour? Certainly he could have come to his apartment, no one would think anything of it. Kirk and Sam stopped by in the middle of the night all the time. Instead here he was, standing on the corner like a damned flapper…_

_“Sebastian.”_

_He felt the voice rather than heard it, and turned immediately, a smile breaking out over his face. He’d wait on a thousand street corners for ten thousand cold winter nights for this. “Dean.”_

_The other man smiled at him, taking one hand out of his pocket to stroke Sebastian’s cheek. “You’re freezing to death out here. I’m so sorry…”_

_“Hardly felt the cold,” Sebastian said absently. “Let’s just go, shall we?”_

_“Of course.” Dean grabbed his hands. “They’ve all gone from my place. Fifth isn’t so far. Would you like to walk?”_

_“Absolutely.”_

_It certainly was a short walk, and one that they rushed as much as they dared due to the cold bite of winter. Before they knew it, they were enveloped in the warmth of Dean’s apartment on Fifth._

_“God, how long were you waiting there?”_

_“Just a few minutes,” Sebastian muttered dismissively. Dean was running his fingers over his face, warming his cheeks and his nose._

_“Come and sit down. “_

_“Yes.” Sebastian nodded as he followed Dean in, the two taking a seat on the couch._

_“You must have been out there for longer,” Dean mumbled, throwing Sebastian’s hat across the room and pushing his coat off of his shoulders. “You’ve frozen solid.”_

_“Not completely,” Sebastian gasped, then, unable to hold it in any longer, pulled Dean down to him, pressing their lips firmly together. He received immediate response, and before long they were scrabbling at buttons and buckles and all of the couch pillows had been tossed or shoved out of the way. Sebastian tugged at Dean’s dark hair, Dean traced Sebastian’s skin with his tongue, hands gripped shoulders, legs tangled around each other, and voices whispered in the dim light of the fire._

_“Oh, God…”_

_“Christ, Seb, what’re you…”_

_“Oh, shit, Dean…”_

_“Hah…oh…”_

_“Nng…oh, God…”_

_“Ah!” His hands tightened on Sebastian. “Seb…Seb-bastian…”_

_“C’mon…Dean, c’mon…”_

_Five minutes later they lay staring at the fire as the air cooled around them. Dean ran his fingers through Sebastian’s hair, Sebastian rested his head on Dean’s chest, listening to the in and out of breaths, to the beating of his heart beneath endless skin and muscles._

_“God, I wish we could stay here,” Dean sighed._

_Sebastian nodded, turning his head to press a kiss to the center of the other man’s chest. “Me too.”_

_“What has society come to,” Dean said softly, “where a man can’t comfortably be in public? Where loneliness is happier than a social gathering?”_

_“More like what have we come to,” Sebastian said softly, “where we can’t tell our closest friends about the best shag we’ve had in a month? Where we’re afraid to be in public, in social gatherings?”_

_“We’ve done nothing wrong,” Dean said, his voice very tiny. Sebastian felt his heart wrench, and looked up at him._

_“Of course we haven’t. If I were less sensible,” he sat up a bit, bringing his face on level with Dean’s, “I’d go all romantic and say I was made for you, drawn to you across the stars.”_

_Dean smiled a bit, giving Sebastian a kiss. “But you’re more sensible than that.”_

_“Most definitely.”_

~

Remus sat up with a start, trying to catch his breath. What kind of a dream was _that_? He racked his brain, recalling every bit that he could. Oh. Oh God. He put a hand over his mouth, feeling like he should be ashamed for…for something. For watching. But…he hadn’t been watching. He’d been…

He quickly lifted the sheets, then shoved them back into place. “Shit!” he whispered violently. All over the fucking sheets. He bounced anxiously for a bit, before he remembered he was a goddamn wizard and grabbed his wand. He quickly cast a cleaning spell, and patted the sheets and his pajamas to make sure everything was clean and dry.

By God, what a strange dream! What kind of person dreams those sorts of things? Of…partaking in that kind of…and what was that guy calling him? It wasn’t even his name. How did he know this guy? It felt like he knew him. And he looked…familiar.

He glanced at his clock. Five-thirty. Probably too early to be awake, but he had a feeling sleep was out of the question for him. He stood, and crept through his curtains, glancing furtively around the room.

He stopped when he saw a shape sitting up in bed across the room. Sirius raised an eyebrow at him.

“Sleep well?”

Remus looked at him dumbfounded for a second. “Why’re you awake?”

“Your whispers aren’t very whispery, Moony. Everything alright?”

“Perfect!” Remus waved a dismissive hand. “I’m just going to take a shower.”

“Mmm. Right. Shower.”

“What the hell do you want from me? Why’re you looking at me like that?”

“No reason.” Sirius flopped back onto his pillows. “Goodnight.”

“Morning,” Remus grumbled, skulking into the bathroom. Sirius was infuriating. He turned on the water, stripping out of his pajamas frustratedly. Stupid git. He stepped under the water, and went about his showering business.

~

“It seems,” Professor Crates started, seeming exasperated, “that there are those of you who are confused as to how to find the love of your life. I thought it would be simple to figure out, but apparently not. So, everyone please stand up.”

Remus and Sirius shared a glance as everyone in the room stood up. More bullshittery. They looked away from each other, trying not to giggle as Crates continued.

“Now please mix up. All of you, mingle about. You three, move to the left, and I want all tables to be separated. There.

“Now, I am about to tell you to wander. What I mean by that is, walk where you feel your heart tells you. If you feel pulled in one direction, follow. If it suddenly changes, follow it there as well. And if it tells you to stand perfectly still, obey. Got it? Right! Wander!”

Remus was not sure what to think of this man at all. This was all nonsense! Really, the past two years had not been nearly as unbelievable. Follow his heart? How was he even supposed to know where it was taking him? He was probably alone anyhow, in this ‘grand scheme’ that Crates so believed. As other students around Remus started to amble around awkwardly, he just crossed his arms and stayed put.

Of course, everyone expected James to walk right to Lily. Even Remus did. But it seemed that James was taking this assignment very seriously, because he actually ambled very slowly through the room, looking people in the eyes. She was obviously trying to avoid him, which greatly annoyed Crates who told her to stand still, stupid girl, and let fate find her if it should.

James eventually ended up flirting with Rebecca Flint, which made the room titter with giggles.

Remus was still just standing at the back of the crowd, watching people ignore their hearts and hit on whatever tickled their fancy, when he felt a…thing.

He shook his head. “Hell no.” This heart bullshit was definitely not happening. It was simple tomfoolery. He was definitely not taking a step forward, definitely not desperately following this tugging, definitely not pushing through the crowd. Of course not. He stopped in his tracks, cursing himself inwardly. This was stupid.

Someone bumped into him from behind, and he turned to see Sirius turning to him. The other boy smiled. “Alright, Moony?”

“Fine.” He shook his head one last time. “What about you?”

“Perfectly fine.” Sirius nodded. “Just…wandering.”

“Oh.”

“Yep.”

Remus nodded, trying to ignore the tugging in his chest. However, it’s difficult to ignore something that doesn’t exist anymore.

Peter sidled up to them, poking Sirius without looking directly at him. Sirius looked over. “Hey, Pete.”

“Guys, this is the wrong time to be talking to each other,” Peter muttered. “You’re looking for the loves of your lives. You’re supposed to be talking to your preferred gender?”

Remus and Sirius looked around, and found themselves being stared at from the corner of almost every eye. “Oh. Well, then.”

Peter sidled away again, and Remus and Sirius looked at each other. “I’m just.” Sirius gestured over his shoulder. “Alright?”

“Yeah, of course.”

“Great. I’ll talk to you later.”

“Of course.” Remus waved at him a bit. “Right. See you later.”

~

“I don’t understand what you want from me, Remus Lupin.”

“You know what, Lily, I just want you to give James a genuine chance. He’s growing up, you know? And he has a very serious and mature interest in you.”

Lily laughed, tossing the quill at Remus across the table. “You’re sooooo funny, Lupin. We both know Potter well enough.”

“C’mon, Lily. I wasn’t entirely kidding. He’s a good kid. And he means well. And…you should hear him talk about you. He means it.”

“Potter is an imbecile,” Lily said dismissively. “Anyways, what did you want to talk about?”

“I don’t think I have a cosmic lover,” Remus sighed, slumping down. “I think I am destined to be eternally alone.”

“Oh, come, Remus, that’s not true,” Lily said decisively. “There has to be somebody for you. If there’s not, then I give up all hope for myself.”

Remus refrained from voicing the fact that he thought rather genuinely that James was her one true love. After a moment of silence, she spoke again.

“Why’re you putting so much stock in this, anyways?” She frowned. “I thought you didn’t even believe it?”

“I don’t!” He sighed. “That’s just it. Either this whole thing is untrue, or…or I’m not feeling anything because there’s nothing to feel, and I’m alone in the vast universe.”

Lily crooned softly. “Remus, don’t you worry at all. If you haven’t felt anything, it’s because you haven’t met them yet. That’s all there is to it.”

Remus nodded. “I hope so.”

“But you haven’t felt anything? All week?”

Remus refrained from mentioning the spasms of day two, convinced he’d been having a heart attack. “I am very decidedly feelingless, Miss Evans.”

“Hmm.” She looked across the library thoughtfully. “Well, don’t worry. You’ll probably have to find some Ravenclaws before you feel anything. Someone with a bit of sense.”

Remus shook his head. “And where will I find any Ravenclaws?”

“Remus Lupin, you are _in_ a library.”

He smiled at her, before closing his Astronomy textbook. “No thank you. I’ll just go to bed, I think.”

Lily huffed exasperatedly. “Fine. But you, Remus, deserve someone more than anyone.”

“Impressive sentence.” He nudged her shoulder with his elbow. “You’d better get to bed pretty soon too, missy.”

“Yes, _dad_.”

“Goodnight, Lily.”

“Goodnight, Remus.”


	3. Chapter Three

_Had you been standing in the hall, you would not have guessed._

_You probably wouldn’t have guessed if you were just in the room, either. No, Devon School had fantastic walls in their dorms. In fact, I would dare to say you wouldn’t have hear it until you were right up to the door._

_“Holy hell, Dominic,” he panted, trying to grip the wet walls of the shower in case his legs gave out. He felt arms wrap around him as Dominic kept the pace, a face nuzzling into his neck and making his legs even weaker. “Oh, God, I’m not going to last,” he gasped. “I’ll probably faint before this is done…”_

_“Of course not.” The arms tightened, became more of a support. “I’ve got you. I won’t let you go.”_

_He let out a soft moan, his fingers going back to twist in the other boy’s soaked hair. Dominic shifted them into a slightly different position, allowing him to use the wall for support, coming on at a different angle._

_“God, Kyle,” he breathed, moving one hand to his hip and snaking the other up to grip his shoulder, pulling on Kyle in rhythm with his thrusts. Kyle was simply trying not to slide all the way to the shower floor._

_All hope for that vanished as Dominic’s new angle gave him basically a straight shot right where it should, and only a moment after the adjustment Kyle could hardly breathe._

_“Dom, shit, oh God, oh God oh God ohgodohgodohgod…”_

_One loud cry, thirty seconds, and another loud cry later, the two were sitting breathless and weak on the shower floor, half in the warm spray of the shower. Kyle had his head in his hands, trying to get over a dizzy spell._

_“You,” he finally croaked out, “are fantastic.”_

_Dom gave a short chuckle. “Am I?”_

_“I think so.”_

_Dom sighed. “One down then, eh?”_

_Kyle cracked a smile, then rested his head on Dominic’s shoulder. “And who cares about the rest?”_

_“My parents,” he whispered, so softly that Kyle almost didn’t hear him over the sound of the running water. “They…they want me to be perfect, you know? Their only son, or whatever, so I have to live up to the impossible bar.”_

_“I wish you didn’t have to.”_

_“So do I.” He shook his head. “But wishing isn’t going to get me anywhere.”_

_Kyle sat quiet for a moment. “What if we…what if we just left? What if we went away? Together? Away from this, away from the school, from your parents, from…the expectations of it all. What if we ran away?”_

_Dominic was quiet for a moment, stroking Kyle’s side thoughtfully. “D’you know what you’re saying, Kyle?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“D’you know what that means?”_

_Kyle looked over at him, and instead of answering (or perhaps it was his answer), he pulled the other boy down to him, giving him a firm kiss. “I love you, Dominic,” he said lowly._

_Dominic looked at him for a moment, something there in his eyes. “Where would we go?” he finally asked._

_“Anywhere in the world.”_

_“What would we do?”_

_“Anything at all!”_

_Dominic laughed. “And what would happen if we didn’t make it in the big cruel world?”_

_“Well, I’d have you,” Kyle said. “And you’d have me. Always.”_

_Dominic looked at him for a moment, his face slowly crumpling, and finally he started crying. He threaded his fingers into Kyle’s hair, pulling the other boy against him as if to protect that precious creature from the cruelty of truth in this world. Kyle wrapped his arms around him, holding onto him and waiting for something._

_Dominic finally let out a sigh. “God, I love you, too, Kyle. So much.” Kyle pulled back to look at him, and he smiled. “I don’t need anything else.”_

~

Remus was starting to notice a trend, as he cleaned up the bed again, cursing aggressively under his breath. And it was that for two dreams in a row, he had been partaking in sexual intercourse. But not just _any_ sexual intercourse. Sexual intercourse of a flamingly homo nature. He tried to think about this as he checked his clock. Four o’clock. Four o’clock in the morning and he was dreaming about participating in homosexual relations. Why was he doing this to himself?

It being too early to get up, he flopped back onto his pillows with a sigh. This was probably something he should talk to Lily about. She would know what to do. But frankly, it was embarrassing. They were wet dreams, no other words for it. And really, he didn’t want to talk about his wet dreams with his best friend’s crush. That would not go over well.

He lay there for a while, pondering the events of the two dreams as if they were one. The theme was quite similar, as stated, and the feeling of the whole situation wasn’t just similar, it was…familiar. Which was heart-attack-worthy, and he tried not to pass out as he wondered _why_ it felt familiar. He’d never had sex and _certainly_ not with a guy. This was all absolutely ludicrous. He scrubbed at his eyelids with he heels of his palms, groaning. If these persisted, he really wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do. He just really hoped they would stop.

~

“Good God, Remus, slow down.”

Remus ignored Peter, continuing to shovel food into his mouth. “I have to study,” he said around the food in his mouth. This was the new tactic. Rush through the day and go to bed early in the hopes that the dreams would stop. Frankly, he thought it was ingenious. Best idea he’d ever had.

“Are you alright, Moony?” Sirius asked, seeming worried. James leaned towards Sirius.

“I think he’s gone mad,” he whispered loudly.

“I am fine,” Remus insisted. He put one last forkful of food into his mouth, and then stood. “I’ll see you guys later.”

At least, he tried to say “I’ll see you guys later.” However, due to a surplus of food in his mouth, it came out as more of a “If thee you buys bater.” This sent Peter into a fit of giggles, which set James off laughing as well. Sirius just frowned. “You’re acting very odd, Remus.”

“I’m okay.” He grabbed his bag. “Bye.”

Sirius watched Remus go, a curious expression on his face. “Jamie,” he said, nudging the other boy. “Have you noticed something up with Moony this year?”

“Wassit, Sirius?”

“Well, he’s just…very secretive . He hasn’t been secretive since…second year! What’s he up to?”

“Oh please, Sirius. Everyone’s got their secrets, particularly our Remus. He’s got more secrets than anyone I’ve ever met.”

Sirius was quiet for a moment. “If I tell you something, promise not to tell anyone else,” he said softly.

James nodded, eyes bright. “Promise.”

Sirius looked at him for a moment. “Twice in the past three weeks, I am positive that Remus has had wet dreams.”

James sniggered once, but cut himself off. “And how the hell do you know?”

“I know,” Sirius said darkly. “I just know these things.”

“You’re a strange person, Sirius Black,” James laughed, “but I refuse to believe you have some magical way of knowing when people are aroused.”

“Well, I do.”

“Right.”

Sirius sighed, looking out the doors of the Great Hall. “I feel like I should go after him. See what’s wrong. Poor kid.”

“Sirius, he’s probably finally developed a crush on a girl. Just leave him alone.”

Sirius stared for another moment. “I don’t think so. He told me he was sure the universe didn’t want him with anyone. I don’t think he wants to be with anyone.”

“Then what was he dreaming about?”

Sirius didn’t answer James. Could Remus have a crush on someone? It didn’t seem to make sense in Sirius’s mind. Remus was always with the Marauders. He couldn’t possibly ever be with anyone else ever. It wasn’t plausible.

“I don’t want him to have a crush on someone,” Sirius said to James absently.

James shrugged, then looked at Sirius suggestively. “Then I guess you’ll have to do something about it.”

Sirius punched James. “Shut up, you tosser.”

James laughed, then looked at Sirius a little more seriously. “Just let it happen, mate. He’s growing up. Albeit, a little late, but still. We’ve all been talking about birds for two years, it’s only natural that he should eventually find one as well.”

Sirius shook his head. It almost didn’t seem very Remus. “I’m going to go up. I’ll see you later.”

“Now who’s acting strange?” James gave him a look, and shook his head. “Fine. See you, Sirius.”

Sirius ambled slowly through the castle, thinking. He entered the Gryffindor Common Room, and only had to scan it for a moment before he flounced over to sit with Remus.

Remus glanced up at the smiling Sirius. “I don’t have time,” he said, looking back down at his Transfiguration essay.

“Aww, Moony.”

“I have to get this done, Sirius, so I can go to bed.”

“What?!” Sirius gaped at him. “It’s hardly eight-thirty! Oh, Mooooooonyyyyyy…”

“I’m sorry, Sirius, but I need rest.”

“You do not! What is up with you, anyways?” He shook his head.

Remus blushed. “Nothing! I just…want some extra rest.”

“Like four hours extra!”

“ _I_ always go to bed at a reasonable hour.”

“This isn’t reasonable!” Sirius sighed, slumping back and pouting at Remus.

Remus ignored his pout. “I am sorry, but I have things to be getting done, alright?”

Sirius sniffled a bit. “I’ll be all aloooone.”

“You have James and Pete!”

“But I want you.”

Remus held down a blush. “Well, you’ll have to have me some other time .”

Sirius groaned, flopping his arms all over the table beside Remus’s homework. “Moony, I simply cannot wait! I need you _now_.”

“If you keep talking like that, I will tell the whole school you’re an insufferable ponce.”

“Let them say what they will!” Sirius proclaimed loudly. He waited for Remus to respond, but receiving none he sighed, leaning back and watching Remus write.

Remus finally reached the end of his parchment, and dotted one final period, before glancing up at Sirius. “Please leave.”

“Why? I haven’t done anything!”

“You’re presence irritates me.”

“Remus.” Sirius leaned across the table, looking at him intensely. “Whatever has gotten into you to make you act this way towards your best friend?”

“Nothing.”

“Oh?”

“Oh exactly.” Remus rolled up his paper frustratedly. “I’m just fine, okay? Leave me alone.”

He stood, and went up the stairs to the dorm. Sirius looked after him in confusion. Something distinctly strange was going on.


	4. Chapter Four

_He ducked under a wooden staff, looking over his shoulder. That was close. He should have been watching where he was going. He shook his head, turning and continuing on his way. He stopped just outside the tent, glanced around, and then ducked inside._

_“Brian?”_

_A head of dark hair poked from behind a flap, and smiled at him. “Sean! Oh, do come in!”_

_Sean made his way around trunks and shields and swords over towards Brian. “This place is a wreck. Do you want me to pick up?”_

_Brian rolled his eyes. “I have my own servants for that, Sean, the last thing I want is for the King’s servant - particularly_ you _\- to be picking up.” He smiled over his shoulder at Sean, before turning to him. “Well? How do I look?”_

_“Knightly,” Sean sighed, brushing nonexistent dust off of the other man’s armor. “Like a noble.”_

_“Well, of course I look that way. I want you to tell me how_ attractive _I am, Sean.”_

_He blushed. “You’re a stupid clotpole,” he muttered, looking around as if people would be listening. “And you should be careful.”_

_“About what?”_

_“About_ this _.”_

_“This? Or…” Brian smirked, collecting Sean into his arms and giving him a kiss. “_ This _?”_

_“Both,” Sean muttered, before Brian claimed his lips again. He allowed himself to be kissed for a moment, before pulling away. “We don’t have_ time _for this today, Brian…”_

_“Oh, kissing’s innocent enough.”_

_“Mmm, but you have a tournament to be preparing for, and I have a king to be preparing.”_

_Brian sighed exasperatedly. “My god, why don’t I just hire you? I could see you more than fifteen days out of the year, could spend more time with you during competition season, and would have you right there in my bedchambers whenever I wanted.”_

_Sean smiled smugly. “Well, you can ask the King, but I just so happen to be an_ excellent _servant, and one he won’t want to get rid of.”_

_“You could quit.”_

_Sean laughed. “You’re not serious, are you?” He looked at Brian contemplatively. “Are you positive you don’t rather enjoy the no-strings long-distance arrangement? You do know me dropping everything to work for you would change that.”_

_Brian laughed. “Sean, you great idiot, I would love nothing more than to have you nearby!” He smiled at him, before stepping away. “But you are right about one thing; there are other matter to attend to right now. You’d best see to the king.”_

_Sean nodded, starting away. “You’d best think about what you said,” he called over his shoulder in mock-threat. “I just detest empty commitment.”_

_Brian laughed, and strode over to grab Sean just before he exited the tent. He pulled him a little back in, and gave him a last thorough kiss. He smirked at the servant. “I try not to think too hard before competitions.”_

_“You be careful. I_ will not _be found cleaning up your guts.”_

_Brian winked at him. “Yes sir.” He ruffled his hair a bit, and the two finally parted ways, one going to his servants, and one going to his king._

~

Remus was very upset. He had thought it was working. For four nights, going to bed unbelievably early had kept the dreams away. So it seemed to be working. But apparently, they had just been taking their sweet time.

The worst part was that with this dream had been enjoyable. Whilst dreaming it, he had felt positive emotions coursing through him. He had been upset to wake up, and then made him even more upset.

He dug the heels of his hands into his eyes, groaning. He noticed that the character, too, was recurring. The one he was with was always the same. There was a vague familiarity, but it was probably just from dream to dream. Probably.

He went about his day quite normally. He awakened his friends, waited impatiently for them, put up with them in the hallways, kicked them in class, and scolded them for show in front of McGonagall. On this day, he did not want to go to Divination. But who was he to not go to class? He was a Prefect. And he lived by a certain moral standard.

And so he went to divination. He wasn’t happy about it. As far as he was concerned, Divination was at fault for this whole situation. It had only started this year, and Divination was the only thing he could possibly link to it because Care of Magical Creatures just didn’t seem all that plausible. But he went.

“Moony, whatever _is_ wrong with you?” Sirius asked him as he sulked.

“I hate Divination,” he grumbled. James and Sirius raised their eyebrows at him.

“Remus!” James exclaimed. “You _love_ Divination!”

He shrugged. “I don’t know what to tell you. It has lost its appeal.”

“It never had any!” Sirius argued. He took a deep breath. “Alright, really, what’s going on?”

Remus shook his head. “I don’t know. The full moon’s coming up, isn’t it? It might be that.”

“The full moon is only once a month,” James pointed out. “And _you’ve_ been moody since the start of the school year.”

Remus didn’t answer, and Sirius looked at James. They nodded at each other, and James got up, going off to talk to Peter or argue with Lily. Sirius looked back at Remus, scooting his chair closer to him. “What’s wrong, Remus? Nothing could be so wrong so you can’t even tell _me_.”

“Since when has that been a rule? And we both know you’d only tell James and Peter anyways.”

“I resent that statement,” Sirius replied. “C’mon, Moony, you’ve got us worried. We don’t want to spend our first full moon with a testy werewolf.”

Remus smiled just a little. “C’mon, Padfoot. I’m alright, I just…” He shrugged. “I don’t know what to tell you. There’s nothing wrong.”

Sirius looked him over. “You promise me, Remus?”

“I promise.”

“Well, you’re a liar, because I know something’s wrong, and I _will_ find out what it is.”

Remus laughed a bit. “Good luck with your wild goose chase, Pads.”

~

“Remus, I really just don’t see why you won’t help me.”

He shrugged. “I’m sorry, Rebecca, but Sirius is my friend, and I at least hold myself to a standard of not smuggling things into my friends’ rooms.”

She sighed, leaning against the table Remus was sitting at. “It’s not smuggling! And it’s not just _his_ room. Look, you can just take the chocolates from me, carry them up to _your_ room, and leave them out in plain sight.”

“With Sirius’s name written on the top in red ink.” He looked at the box again. “And the ‘i’s dotted with hearts? Really Rebecca? I almost expected more.”

She blushed, flipping her hair over her shoulder. “ _Please_ , Remus. I don’t know any other Gryffindors I can trust with this mission!”

“You and James looked pretty friendly last week.”

“Well, that’s more like _flirting_. With you it’s not-“

She stopped, clearing her throat, and Remus pursed his lips, closing his book and looking up at her. “Alright,” he said. “That makes sense.”

“So you’ll do it?”

“I _never_ said that.”

She let out a despairing noise, flopping into the chair next to his. Madame Pince glared at her through the bookshelves, and she and Remus rolled their eyes at each other. Girls.

“Remus.” He looked over, and was greeted by bright blue eyes, pleading with him. Was that a tear? That was definitely a tear. God, she was nearly as good at this as Sirius himself.

“Please.” He crossed his arms. “I really do feel like Sirius could be _The One_. He just…hasn’t quite realized it yet. It’s just a little love potion. Twelve little chocolates, three drops a piece…”

Remus raised an eyebrow. “Three drops? You girls go big or go home, don’t you?”

“Oh, _please_ , Remus!”

He sighed, holding out his hand. “Fine. Give them to me.”

She broke out into a grin. “Oh, will you really?”

“Just hurry up before I change my mind.”

“Thank you Remus!” She pressed the box into his hand, pulling him up out of his chair for a back-breaking hug. “You’re a great friend!”

“Friend,” Remus wheezed. “Yeah, right.”

She released him, and he stopped to catch his breath. “Just…don’t blame me if he doesn’t eat them.”

“Don’t worry! Not liable at all!”

“Right.” He grabbed his bag. “Then I’ll be going now. Bye, Rebecca.”

“Bye, Remus! Thanks again!”

He muttered something to her as he turned and headed out of the library. Really. _Girls._ He shook his head, fingers tapping against the box the whole way to Gryffindor Tower. He stopped inside the portrait hole, looking across the room. Should he just toss them in the fire? He looked down at the box. _Sirius_. ’I’s dotted with hearts. He felt his dinner churning, and lifted his face up to look at the fire again, biting his lip as he contemplated.

“Here.”

He chucked the box at Sirius’s head as he entered the dorm, tossing his bag onto his bed. Sirius looked over just in time to catch the box with his forehead.

“Ow! Moony, why’re you attacking me with…early Valentine’s…?”

“They’re a gift,” Remus muttered. “From Rebecca Flint.”

“Oh, are they?” He smiled at the box. “That’s certainly nice of her. But what for? My birthday’s not for two months…”

Remus shared a look with Peter. “They’re not a birthday gift, Pads,” Peter said.

“Aren’t they?”

Remus shook his head. “And with that, I leave him to you.”

Sirius opened up the box as Remus changed into his pajamas, looking it over. Remus sat down on his bed, and Sirius looked up.

“Moony, I don’t like the cherry ones.”

“So?”

“Do you want my cherry ones?”

Remus looked at him, smiling crookedly. “Sirius, I’m not going to eat any of those.”

“Why not? You love chocolate.”

Peter sighed. “Sirius, they are so _obviously_ laced with love potion, I’m surprised you don’t bump into things more often, you know.”

Sirius looked at them a moment longer, before closing them up. “Why’d she want to give me love potion?”

“Because she likes you!” Remus said. Sirius looked up.

“She could just say so. Rebecca’s nice enough. I’d go with her.”

“Well please tell her that. Tell them all that. They’re driving me mad.”

“Okay.” Sirius stood up, heading towards the door.

“You’re not going to try to tell her now, are you?” Peter asked.

Sirius laughed. “No. I’m going to burn these stupid chocolates.”

Remus watched him go, then looked at Peter. “Really though, what do they all see in him?”

“I have no idea,” Remus replied, climbing into bed. “Goodnight, Wormtail.”

“Goodnight, Moony.”


	5. Chapter Five

_“Tomai…Tomai.”_

_He felt a hand on his face. Repeatedly. Hitting him._

_“C’mon, c’mon, get up.”_

_He stretched a little, opening his eyes. “Mm, good morning.”_

_Zephyr smirked at him. “It’s not morning.”_

_“Well, good night, then.”_

_He smiled at him. “You slept the entire day away. Keep this up, and I’ll have to limit you.”_

_Tomai scoffed, sitting up. “Please. We both know it’ll be more of you limiting yourself._ You’re _the one who’s always tiring me out.”_

 _“Well, I’ve got to have_ something _to do.”_

_Tomai rolled his eyes, shoving him out of the way as he stood up, wandering across the room to look out over the city in the dying sunlight. People were starting to filter back into their homes, windows in the lower town already flickering with firelight. He sighed, leaning against a pillar._

_“Gythium is lovely this time of day, isn’t it?” Zephyr commented, coming up beside Tomai. “Looks like the roofs are on fire.”_

_Tomai nodded. “It’s nice.”_

_“Hm.” Zephyr slipped an arm around Tomai, who smirked a bit._

_“I just woke up.”_

_“So?”_

_“So, I know what you’re getting at.”_

_Zephyr sighed. “Really, Tomai, you act like I never think of anything else.”_

_“Well, for all I know, you don’t.”_

_Zephyr smiled at him. “C’mon. I’ll find you something to eat. You just sit down.”_

_Tomai watched him walk away, wandering over to take a seat on a bench. He watched the sun sink behind the buildings, listening to Zephyr knocking around, looking for food._

_“Here.”_

_He jumped a bit, looking over. “Oh.” He accepted the plate from Zephyr, smiling at him. “Thank you.”_

_“You’re welcome.” Zephyr took a seat beside him. “What’re you thinking so hard about?”_

_“Time,” Tomai responded softly, looking across the city again and taking a bite of his food._

_“Profound thinking,” Zephyr commented. “Whatever could there be to think about in time?”_

_“I’m not sure.” He glanced at Zephyr. “What do you think it would be like to live forever?”_

_“Forever?”_

_They sat quietly for a moment, pondering. Forever was a very long time. To contemplate its entirety was frightening. The word itself had a lonely sound. A sound that was empty. A sound that was sad._

_“If I lived forever,” Zephyr said softly. “I’d spend it loving you.”_

_Tomai smiled sadly at the plate in his lap, the two subconsciously leaning towards each other. He sighed, looking across the city._

_“That’s a long time,” he said quietly. “Wouldn’t you grow lonely?”_

_“Not with you to love.”_

_“But what if I wasn’t with you? What if something were to happen to me and you lived long after I was gone?”_

_“I’d love you anyways,” Zephyr said determinedly. “Because I’m sure that somewhere out there…” He gestured to the whole of Gythium and the land beyond. “Somewhere in time and in this great big world… We’d meet again.”_

_Tomai let his eyes scan the city again. “You really think so?”_

_“Tomai, I promise you.”_

_He smiled a bit. “What do you think you’d be like in the future?”_

_Zephyr sighed. “Well, I’d probably be just as handsome.”_

_Tomai laughed. “Well, I’d certainly hope so, if I’ve got to spend forever with you.”_

_“And of course, you’ll remain as paranoid and prim as ever. A stickler, to be sure.”_

_“Oh, and you’ll always be an absent-minded fool, forgetting your own head if it weren’t attached.”_

_Zephyr grinned, putting his chin on Tomai’s shoulder. “And I wonder what name I’ll be crying out into the night…Achilles, Hercule…”_

_“Maybe you’ll be Christos.”_

_“Perhaps I’ll be calling you Pythos…”_

_“Sirius,” Tomai said softly, gazing out at the darkening sky._

_“Sirius?”_

_“For you.” He turned to Zephyr. “Don’t you like it?”_

_“It sounds…pompous.”_

_“Then it’s perfect.” Tomai smiled, turning back to the city, and Zephyr put his lips to his neck._

_“Sirius, hm…?” He sighed, sending shivers across Tomai’s skin. “I don’t know…I guess if you really think it could at some point be my name, it wouldn’t be so bad to hear you say it…”_

_He slipped his arms around Tomai, pulling him close, and the other man sighed, allowing his eyes to fall shut. “Sirius…”_

_Zephyr made a low noise, threading his fingers into Tomai’s hair and pulling his head to the side so he could get at more of his neck. His teeth scratched at his skin, and Tomai let out a soft moan, his back arching. “Ah, Sirius…”_

_Hands fumbling with his clothes, slipping beneath them onto his skin. “Mm, God, Sirius…”_

_Sirius…_

~

Remus shot up in bed, only to cry out in pain and clutch his left arm to his chest. Where the hell was he? He looked around, and saw that he was in a bed. Not his bed, but also sort of…yes, his bed. This was the Shrieking Shack. Alright.

“What is it, Moony?”

Remus leapt at the sound of Sirius’s voice, looking down at his sleepy form. His dream came back to him, and he scrambled for sheets to cover himself with.

“Padfoot! What the hell’re you doing?! I’m _naked_!”

“Yeah, I realized that’s a side effect of being a werewolf,” Sirius grumbled, frowning and rubbing his eyes. He stopped, and looked over at Remus, who looked back at him, and they shared a strange moment of awkwardness, fear shining in both of their eyes.

“I, um.” Sirius scrambled out of the bed, and Remus noted with a feeling of unfairness that _Animagi_ got to keep their clothes. “I just, you passed out on the floor after you changed back, and James and Peter were too, you know, well they were, uh, squeamish, I guess, so they went in, and I took you to bed - I mean! I put you in your bed, okay? And you were, uh.” He rubbed the back of his head. “I mean, you kind of…you asked, and I, well, I stayed.”

He looked at Remus. He just stood there, scratching at his head, in his t-shirt and his jeans and socks, his hair all ruffled and his eyes still bleary. For a moment, Remus was sure he’d seen nothing more desirable in his life.

“Do you want your clothes?” Sirius finally asked, and Remus nodded, pulling the blanket up over his shoulders, wanting it to swallow him whole. Sirius went to the wardrobe, pulling Remus’s clothes down off of the top and carrying them over to him.

Remus let the covers fall down again, but winced as he tried to lift his arm to get dressed. “What happened here, then?” he asked, indicating to his arm.

“Ah, right.” Sirius sat down by Remus, lifting his arm and helping to maneuver it into his sleeve as painlessly as possible. “Yeah, we couldn’t stop Moony from doing that. He was very upset, poor chap. Very upset. And confused by our presence, it seemed. It took me a while to calm him down.”

Remus pulled the shirt over his head, and looked at Sirius. “Thank you,” he said. “All of you. For doing this for me. This is by far _not_ the worst I’ve ever had. It’s really the best.”

“Don’t mention it, Remus.” He smiled at him. “We were happy to help. Look at you! All bright and sunny.”

Remus laughed a bit. “Thanks. Now go away.”

Sirius looked at it him in confusion, and Remus sighed impatiently. “I’ve got to put my pants on? Plus Madame Pomfrey will be out here any minute…”

“Oh.” Sirius nodded. “Right. I’ll be on my way, then.” He stood, and looked down at Remus. “But promise you’ll hurry and try to find us?”

Remus chuckled to himself. “If Madame Pomfrey doesn’t drown me in questions first.”

“Right. Okay. See you, Remus.”

“You might want to go as Padfoot,” Remus called after him as the door closed. He waited until Sirius’s footsteps died away, and then stood to pull on the rest of his clothes before Pomfrey came barging in. Then he sat down to think.

That dream made quite clear what Remus had been shying away from for weeks. It was Sirius. In all those dreams he’d been having, in the visions of being held and loved. It had been Sirius, across the millennia.

He let out a shaking breath, putting a hand over his mouth. What was this supposed to mean? That Crates was _right_? It wasn’t remotely possible. And it was _stupid_.

Alright, he thought, let’s pretend it _might_ be true. What was he supposed to do now? He couldn’t approach Sirius about it. What if he didn’t believe him? Worse still, what if Remus wasn’t right? The chances were bare on that one, but he wasn’t willing to risk it. If he was going to go along with this stupid theory, he was going to do it right.

He sighed, exhausted. “God, Sirius….”

“Remus?”

He jumped at the knock on the door, straightening himself out as Madame Pomfrey peered in, smiling at him. Then she stopped.

“My my!” She hurried over, inspecting him. “Why, there’s hardly a scratch on you! Impossible!” She looked at him, bewildered, and he shrugged.

“Beats me.”

“Well, have you done anything different?”

“No, ma’am.”

“Not broken routine? At all?”

“Not as far as I’m aware.”

“You didn’t spin seven times in a circle or, say, call on the Dark Lord Satan?”

He looked at her in shock. “Why, Poppy, how’d you guess?”

She smiled at him nervously, before going back to inspecting him. “I don’t believe it.” She yanked his shirt off over his head, staring at him. “It’s impossible, but…” She laughed once, handing him his shirt. “Remus, you’ve pleased the wolf. I don’t know how but…he’s definitely less angry.”

He smiled at her, hurriedly putting his shirt back on. “Good.”

“Yes. Mysterious and good.” She shook her head. “Well, c’mon, we’ll take you back to the castle and take care of that arm.”

~

“I’m terrified, Lily,” he concluded, looking at her with wide eyes.

Lily let out a slow breath. “That’s quite something, Remus,” she said softly.

I know. Do you have, like, advice or anything?”

She looked at him sadly. “Remus you should talk to him.”

He leaned back, shaking his head. “I can’t do it, Lils,” he said matter-of-factly. “I’m scared witless whenever I’m around him, these days. Afraid he’ll…read my mind, or something, figure it out wrong and never speak to me again.”

“Remus, he’s your _soul mate_. If you’ve been seeing him in these dreams - without the two of you being remotely involved in such a way currently, mind you - then he must feel the same way. Somewhere deep inside.” She leaned forward. “Even if he doesn’t right away, he will eventually come around. You can’t hide from destiny.”

Remus shook his head, staring at the table. The whole conversation was beginning to sound straight out of a soap opera. “Lily, what if I’m wrong?” he asked softly, looking up at her.

She raised an eyebrow. “Do you think you are?”

He shook his head slowly. “No. God, Lils, it feels like I’ve known him forever. I mean, I’ve known him for years, I know, but…everything is familiar now. I know just how he smiles, I know what he’ll say next, I can predict his movements…and I ache, Lily.” He looked at her. “It really does hurt.”

She clicked her tongue, looking at him sadly. “God, Remus, do I envy you.” She sighed. “You’re really in love, you know that?”

He shook his head. “I’m terrified.”

She sighed, standing. “Well, all I can tell you is to tell him. Anyways you’ll ache forever.”

She walked off, giving him a quick kiss on the head as she passed, and he stared at the wall.

“But forever’s such a long time.”

~

“Is he asleep?”

Sirius nodded, glancing down at Remus. “Right in the middle of his Potions essay. Figures.” He reached over, picking up Remus’s quill and inkwell and placing them on his nightstand. He rolled up what he had so far of his essay, and James smiled, leaning forward.

“Look at how cute Moony is,” he whispered. “I mean like, cute like a puppy. Not cute like attractive. More like…adorable.”

Sirius glanced at James, leaning over Remus again to put his essay by his other things. “I guess.”

James sighed, rolling his eyes at Sirius. “Just agree, would you? Being weird about Remus’s cuteness is rather suspicious.”

Sirius ignored him, turning back to work on his own essay. James and Peter shared a glance, smirking.

“I’m going to bed,” James announced, switching off his lamp. “Be sure to tuck in Moony and give him my love. Goodnight.”

He closed his curtains, and after a few minutes of reading Peter quietly followed suit. Sirius continued working on his essay for a minute, before glancing down at Remus again. He sighed, running his fingers through the werewolf’s hair.

“What’re we dreaming about tonight, Remus?” he mumbled, watching his chest rise and fall as he breathed. “Where’ve we been?”

Remus, of course, didn’t answer, because he was asleep. Sirius sighed, rolling up his essay and standing. He pulled Remus’s covers over him, switching off the light and closing the curtains before going over to his own bed.


	6. Chapter Six

Sirius watched James’s hand flit across the paper, jotting down words in a quick and practiced script that looked purposefully fancy and careful. He caught Lily’s name several times. Mostly because he’d enchanted the ink to glitter every time he wrote her name.

“Prongs…”

“If you’re going to try and talk me out of this again, forget it,” James muttered, not looking up. “I know she’s the one, Pads, and I’m going for it no matt-“

“Shut it.” Sirius put his hand on James’s note, forcing him to look up.

“Sirius, are you alright?”

Sirius sighed, glancing around. “Prongs, can I talk to you about something?”

“Of course.” He put down his quill. “What’s wrong?”

“Okay, you just…you have to hear me out, alright?” He fidgeted nervously. “Keep an open mind?”

James looked at him a moment. “You’ve got me worried, Pads,” he said lowly. “What is it?”

Sirius took a deep breath.

~

_“Marschieren!”_

_The bell rang throughout the camp, and the soldiers all kept at their stations, straight and tall. Delaware kept his eyes straight ahead at the block, watching the figures scurry out. He saw one in particular, following the man’s movements with his eyes as he scrambled into line. He felt his heart break as he looked over, their eyes meeting._

_“It seems,” the commandant started loudly, looking over the lines of prisoners before him, “that some of you are unable to follow the rules.”_

_Delaware felt his heart stutter, and he and Aaron shared another glance._

_“To show how serious we are about the rules,” the commandant shouted, “we have a demonstration for you today.”_

_He stopped in his slow amble, turning to face the lines of prisoners. “25673!”_

_A small girl was thrust forward, looking fearfully at the commandant._

_“24609! 25083! 24899! 25007!”_

_Delaware’s insides squeezed as Aaron took a shaking step forward, standing out with the other four prisoners. The wind blew torturously fast and cold through the camp, and the prisoners all huddled together for warmth. The five in the middle, however, were left to shiver by themselves. Delaware had to stare above Aaron’s head to keep from crying at the sight of him shaking all alone in this desolate place._

_Once the wind died down, the commandant started calling out again._

_“Peterson! Snidt! Weissnachten! Kuchten! Steinway!”_

_Delaware forced a blank mask onto his face, stepping forward. He closed his eyes a moment. ‘God, please, no.’_

_Aaron looked up at him fearfully, and the commandant started speaking again. “The time has come for you all to understand how to follow authority!” he shouted. “Officers!”_

_They all brought their guns forward, Delaware just a beat too late. He couldn’t pull his eyes away from Aaron’s terrified face, staring back at him._

_“Aim!”_

_Delaware brought the gun into position up against his shoulder robotically, aiming shakily at Aaron. He shook his head infinitesimally._

_“I can’t,” he mouthed._

_Aaron shook his head back. “You have to.”_

_“On my count!”_

_“Delaware, you have to,” Aaron muttered quickly. They could feel the eyes of the other officers, looking from the corners of their eyes._

_“Eins!”_

_His gun shook in his hand. “I…”_

_“Zwei!”_

_A single tear rolled down Aaron’s face, and he lowered his head. “Please.”_

_“Drei!”_

_Five shots rang through the camp, and five bodies fell limp in the dirt. They all lowered their guns as the rest of the prisoners fidgeted, some of the children crying silently in line. Delaware stood silently as the commandant said a few words before sending the prisoners back to their blocks. He walked past Delaware. “Clean up this mess, Steinway.” He stopped, looking him straight in the face. “And this,” he glanced at the body at Delaware’s feet, “was a warning.”_

_The street cleared out, and Delaware finally closed his eyes, allowing himself to cry. He leaned on his rifle, covering his eyes with one hand. “Jesus, what’ve I done…”_

_He sank into the dirt. He lifted Aaron by his shoulders, pulling his still form partially into his lap._

_There was a faint cough, and his heart stopped. “Aaron?” he said quietly._

_The other man coughed again, one hand clutching weakly at his uniform. “Del…”_

_“God, I’m sorry,” Delaware sobbed. He put a hand over the bullet wound in his side. “I don’t…”_

_“Shh.” Aaron gave him a pained smile which faded in an instant as a freezing wind cut through the street. Delaware clutched Aaron close, and looked down at him after the air stilled._

_“I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry, what’ve I done…”_

_“Delaware.” Aaron gave a half-smile half-grimace. “You had to.”_

_“I could have died instead.”_

_“Not instead.” He shook his head. “They would’ve gotten me, Del.”_

_Delaware held Aaron close, lowering his head and letting out a sob. “God, Aaron, how can I go on? How can I live without you, knowing you died of a shot from my gun…”_

_Aaron smiled at him a bit. “It’s okay, Delaware…” He winced, closing his eyes. “I know that…we’ll meet again.”_

_Delaware sobbed again. “Aaron…”_

_Aaron sighed, relaxing. “‘S not so bad…there’s a light, Del…” He clutched at him, struggling for his next breath. “Hah…and just…one more thing…”_

_“Shh, Aaron.” He shifted the other man around in his arms. “What is it?”_

_Aaron whimpered weakly, gripping the collar of Delaware’s uniform. “I really love you,” he gasped, tears forming in the corners of his eyes. Delaware grabbed his hand, biting his lip in an attempt to muffle his sobs._

_“I love you too.”_

_“I’m really going to miss you.” He winced again, curling around his bullet wound. “And I’m sorry. That things were so complicated, and that I’m leaving you…”_

_Delaware shushed him. “It’s alright. I’ll be okay.”_

_Aaron coughed, arching up as he struggled for breath. Delaware held onto him as he writhed and gasped, before falling limp in his arms._

_It was ten torturous minutes that he stayed there in the dirt, sobbing. Finally, two of the other officers sneaked beside him silently, one of them pulling Aaron from his grasp and the other holding Delaware in place, muttering to him and sending him into the barracks, running to collect the other corpses, taking them off to the crematoriums._

_Everyone in the camp shivered, holding their breath as the scent crept through the blocks, the ash rising into the sky._

~

Sirius stared at his hands sadly as James contemplated. He clenched them to stop their shaking, glancing up at him.

James raised his eyebrows. “And you’re sure…that was Remus?”

Sirius nodded, looking back at his hands. “Positive.”

“How can you tell from one dream?”

Sirius looked at James, his expression pained. “It’s not been just one dream, Prongs.”

James nodded. “Is this what’s been going on, Pads?”

He nodded, and James shrugged. “Well, how d’you know he’s been having them too?”

Sirius shook his head at the table. “James, he woke up this morning crying.” He looked up. “To be honest, it was the most heartbreaking thing ever.”

James shrugged. “I…I don’t know what to tell you, Pads. I feel like the two of you should just…talk about it.”

Sirius sighed. “How would I even bring this up?”

“Very carefully.” James leaned forward. “The thing is, Sirius, if Remus has been having these dreams as well, he should feel exactly the same.”

Sirius made a face. “Prongs, he doesn’t believe this whole One Thousand Timeless Roses theory. What if he won’t listen, or he’s disregarded it, or he’s in denial?”

“Would he have cried if he was?”

Sirius was quiet a moment, before he stood. “I don’t know. Thanks for your help, Prongs.”

“No problem, Sirius.” He looked back at his note as Sirius headed up to the dorm. After a thoughtful moment, he scrapped the whole note, pulling out a new sheet of paper.


End file.
